Bromsgrove Artrix Wed Sept 1st

After the sheer blast of splendiferousness that was Liverpool, there was always going to be an element of " after the Lord Mayor's show " about the first gig after it. That show happens to be in sunny Bromsgrove ( actually VERY sunny, and gusset-moisteningly hot, too ) at a new theatre called Artrix ( I always thought he was Obelix's mate in the cartoon strip, but there you go ). Arthur's flown back in from a couple of days break back on Fuertaventura, and having recharged our batteries a bit we're looking forward to rejoining the fray as we motor down the M6 onto the M5, eventually finding ourselves in the sun - drenched car park of the theatre. Tomps is back on the tour from now until the end as Clive is off doing things like being a squire to the Barron Knights, so we're planning to have a bit of a chinwag with Den when he arrives, just to make sure all the visual elements of the show are totally nailed. Our plans are soon to be kicked into touch, however, as we get a call from Nick saying that a truck has overturned on the M42, and as a result he's stuck in stationary traffic...has been for the past half hour, in fact. As all our gear is spread across two vehicles, this is going to be a bit of an arsebiscuit....we've got the PA system with us but Nick's carrying the moving lights, which really should go in early, as well as our white backdrop, which really should go in first. We can build all the stuff we're carrying on OUR van, but then we're going to have to shoehorn all of Nick's gear in around it when he gets here, and that's the kind of palaver that just makes you break out in funbumps. A couple of calls later and it becomes clear that Nick, sitting in a sweltering stew of stationary vehicles, really isn't going to be getting here any time soon, so we bite the bullet and start setting up. We then realise that there's a very good chance the band are also stuck in the very same traffic, and a couple of phone calls proves this to be the case. The portents are not good. It's actually 3.30 by the time Nick finally pulls up, hot, stressed, and with a face like thunder. " Nice trip ?" I venture playfully.
" GRRRRRAAAAHHHNNNGGGRR" he replies, gnawing on my forearm. Not happy, then.....As it transpires, his late arrival isn't anywhere near as much of a nutcracker as we'd feared, and we get sorted relatively quickly, but the delay to the band themselves is giving us a headache now, not only because we're running out of soundcheck time but also because Den's got a revised show disk coming with him, and we need to get it into the computer, checked and readied. I'm expecting a stream of vented frsutration and invective, but when they finally DO arrive, the band are surprisingly chilled, and my forearms remain unsullied. Arthur and Tomps sort out the show visuals with Den and then we belt through a truncated soundcheck, but it doesn't feel hurried or stressful....in fact it has the slickness of a piece of well-oiled machinery, and it's another one of those moments where you think " We're all actually quite good at this, aren't we ? " There's even time to send our chief hunter-gatherer Damian and Pug out into the sun - dappled evening charged with the task of finding sustenance for the crew that doesn't come in a wrapper marked " Cadbury's ". He's a skilled fodder tracker, is our Damian...despite weighing about three and a half stone wringing wet and being so skinny that he virtually disappears when he turns sideways, he clearly has a fearsomely fast metabolism as he he can pack away his tucker with all the speed and panache of a big fat bastard like my good self. He's the kind of bloke who could find a KFC in the middle of the Kalahari desert, so the task of securing several portions of excellent fish and chips on a Wednesday night in Bromsgrove is almost unworthy of his talents. Nonethless, in what seems like no time at all we're chowing down backstage, making so many little involuntary moans of pleasure that it sounds uncomfortably like the set of a soft porn movie. There really IS nothing ike a good infusion of lard to set you up for a gig... The band are back to the " tour show " tonight after the diversifications of Liverpool, and within seconds of the opening " From Me To You " Tomps tells me over the intercom " Ah, this takes me right back to March ! " as he happily flies in the film footage, and I realise once again that yes, we ARE all good at this, band and crew alike. We blew away a few cobwebs in Whitley Bay but from then on in everyone's just dropped right back into the touring groove from five months ago. There aren't many set changes from last time....Happy Together and Sunny Afternoon have become a joyous medley instead of two separate numbers... there's no " On The Beach " and " Surfin' Safari " is back, but the pace and the power are still potent, and tonight we have a good - sized and vocal audience to bounce off. In fact, the whole show is pretty flawless; there are the usual couple of little technical niggles that we'll talk about in the car on the way back tonight, but by and large it's been a lovely, easy show considering all the transport nightmares that went on earlier and which could have seriously derailed things. It's nights like these when I can almost sit back and enjoy the band and the show rather than work on it, and I know that this is the " zone " the band are so good at getting into; it's smooth confidence without complacency, and it's this as much as anything else that's going to stand us in good stead over what will hopefully be many years of touring this show. More like this one, please.....!